SEPTEMBER 25, 2012

Log from September 25^th:

I made a terrible mistake. The Mistress is...beyond furious, with me.

She is keeping a closer eye on me - perhaps that's the best thing to come of this. I know she won't leave... I only regret that I have that kind of insurance through such means.

However...she's sent so many Marked after Russ that I fear her hunger is neglected. She has regressed to that weaker state. I know for certain, now, that when she's like this, it's as though her memory is wiped clean. She can't recall what's been going; it's all a fuzzy haze.

She asks for Jack, and for Razzie. She asks what's been happening. She eats and sleeps, as I do.

It's...disgusting.

SEPTEMBER 24, 2012

Log from September 24^th:

soemtimes red got viscous

and tore people open like how Razzie would

that was for fun but not bcause she was angry

red is angry now

THE RAKE BEDTIME STORY

I don’t think that there’s a way of escaping

Can’t tell what’s louder; the whispers or scraping

And the wound that he put in my chest is just gaping

But at least I’m not raving mad.

Even as I run, there’s this voice in my ear

That’s kept me from rest for more than a year

Suddenly, the beast has made it so clear

The world knows me as a Maenad.

SEPTEMBER 22, 2012

Log from September 22^nd:

You know what I love?

Well, a lot of things.

You know what I don't love, aside from stop signs (seriously, how dare they make 'red' mean 'stop'. I mean, have they met me?) and poorly-written porn? People trying to take my things.

This morning, my Priestess is quiet, and you know what they say; communication is the key to any relationship. Seeing as I don't 'do relationships' I went the sneaky route instead. Turns out she's packed up most of her things and she's been perusing comments left by a particular fuck-bag who, if I'm not mistaken, is talking pretty big for a guy on the run.

Also happened to notice that someone among my Scarlet-marked ranks gave him an account on this site. What the actual fuck, guys. Was I not perfectly clear about the loathing?

In any case, I've actually gotten pissed to the point of directing all of my Marked your way, Russ. I'm sure you're reading this, and I can only hope that in the time it takes to make it through this latest log, they've hunted you down and slit you open sideways.

SEPTEMBER 21, 2012

Log from September 21^st:

My Mistress's presence has led to a lot of give and take. She gives me her protection, and in turn, I give her all I have in me to give. The only thing is...sometimes - very rarely - she has these lapses. She becomes disoriented, confused...she acts almost drunk. The first time, she nearly slipped away back into the Empty City. I panicked and begged her to stay, so she did...but she seemed so...weak.

She goes on about strange things, but the part that worries me is how she addresses herself. She'll refer to the Red Cap like it's something else entirely. It's as if she doesn't know who she is. The dog gets antsy, while she's in that state - growling, getting hostile. At one point, it even attacked her. She slaughtered him, and left a pile of rotting flesh where the canine used to be.

Just thinking back on it gives me nightmares. I swear that pile of skin looked familiar. Maybe that's just my mind playing tricks on me, but even so... I'm not exactly sad to see the dog go.

After she killed him, she became herself again. Still, periodically, there are...lapses. Times when she stops being my Mistress, and becomes... 'Red'. Before, there was no telling one from the other, but...

Have I gone mad? Is it only my perception that's changed?

The only certain thing is that I don't feel safe with her, when she isn't strong.

SEPTEMBER 15, 2012

Log from September 15^th:

So I've been a little power-high these last few days. Or weeks. It's all been one big rush of good-feelings, so it's hard to tell by this point. Anyway - I've been doing my thing as king of the world and, in the process, maybe got a little neglectful. My Priestess has lost so much blood from being in my presence that she needed a quick trip to the ER.

Sucks.

On the plus side, just walking in there clued me in to how many naughty nurses went professional. That hospital's not so white and shiny anymore...

SEPTEMBER 6, 2012

Log from September 6^th:

My poor little harlot's been worn right the fuck out. I guess a life on the run doesn't suit her so well. She's essentially spent the last few days recuperating... Which is to say, sleeping. I'll give her a little bit of a grace period to get back on her feet after the shaky 'oh god what the fuck please, Mistress, hold me and make it better' wears off. Then, c'mon, she really ought to be praising me and whatnot.

When someone saves you, sex ought to be involved. It's Damsel 101. Why the hell isn't my damsel getting to the sex-part? Not with me, obviously - no touching of the nice things for fear of wrecking them - but we've passed some perfectly decent lesbians and she hasn't so much as given them a good ogle.

Maybe her fixation with me is starting to get in the way of our relationship. I'm thinking marriage counselling.

SEPTEMBER 4, 2012

Log from September 4^th:

i miss Red

and i miss Razzie

no puppies in the Court

THE BRUTE AND BURNING BRIDE BEDTIME STORY

A tale older than time, much like Beauty and the Beast

Their rings forged in rage, vows not spoken by a priest

Rip yourself asunder before strife can do it first

Fear split in two will put the violent at their worst.

SEPTEMBER 2, 2012 (PM)

Log from September 2^nd (PM):

My Mistress has come back to me...different.

Knowing what I do, now, I don't know how my perceptions may have changed. Perhaps I was viewing her as weak, or...pitiable? She is anything but. The woman who returned to me, who raised me back up just as terror was beginning to overwhelm...she's strong. Almost aggressive. She came to me, took me under her arm, and essentially told me that I would have nothing more to worry about from the Things that have been following me. Since then, the terror is lessened.

I still see a grey haze at the corner of my eye, like something floating over my vision. I still feel something watching from the shadows. However, I know they cannot touch me, while she's near.

It's relieving in ways I can't even begin to describe.

SEPTEMBER 2, 2012

Log from September 2^nd:

Found her.